First Contact

Why I Am A Christian, Part 1

By George Graham

There we were, a group of five year-olds, reciting the only Bible verse we knew. “For God so loved the world.” A few kids dropped out, “that he gave His only begotten son.” Now it was down to one girl and me; “that whosoever believeth in Him.” I was alone on the last line; “shall not perish but have everlasting life.” I was so proud of myself. Honestly I was not especially known for being the star pupil then or later in life. I remember wondering what begotten meant?

After church, I was playing on the floor with a toy, a dump truck if memory serves. The verse came to mind. I remember thinking “all I have to do is believe in Jesus and I get to live forever. I believe that.”

Immediately something happened for which there is no description. I experienced a knowing beyond my own knowing that it was true. Theologians call it a revelation. I knew it was true and have ever since but can not tell you how I know. My best descriptive effort is to call it a knowing beyond my knowing.

Now, after that truly life altering experience, I returned to doing what a kid does. I continued playing on the floor with my toy.

Throughout life I have struggled with confidence issues. That landed me in a cult under the thumb of an abusive cult leader in my 20s. His dominance over me began to collapse when he mockingly encouraged me to commit suicide. If I was worthless to the cult, as he seemed to be saying, then I needed to see if there was a life where I was not worthless. H alsoe made another mistake. He told me my childhood belief in Jesus Christ was a fake. He said I was using a phony made-up experience to avoid really believing.

As he said my experience was phony, that amazing moment reoccurred within me. And I knew, beyond my own knowing, he was wrong. No matter what else he knew, had to say, whatever he could do, I knew beyond my own knowing that he had stepped outside his purview as a human being. That knowing helped me escape from the abusive cult.

In the most difficult moments in life, it is there, the unshakable experiential foundation, not out of myself, but from God through Jesus Christ to me. How do I know? Somehow I know beyond my own knowing.

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This introduction will give you the flavor of what I experienced. For a further look at my experiences click here. If you have the gist of things and wish to skip to the conclusion, click here.